FEMINIST MYTHS BUSTED – 2

Thank you so much for taking out the time to read this article. This is regarding a series of my blog, for which I’m asking a few questions about feminism and how it is been misunderstood by most people.

I got the opportunity to interact with @neelaasapphire who speaks about certain myths of being a feminist in this interview article.

Thank you so for having a chat with me, so I would like to ask you what does feminism mean in your opinion. Why do you think people are afraid when they hear feminist in front of anyone’s name? Why do you think that people think it’s a bad word?

Well, I think they are afraid because there is a stigma that feminists target men and hate men. The main reason is the movement has the word “feme” in it and that makes them think it is a movement of females against males. It is not “humanist” or “equalist” because you have to address the problem which is that women have been excluded from basic and fundamental human rights!

Also, another reason is that some people think women get more superiority which hurts male egos mainly. They think they will lose on power, authority and even opportunities. Gender roles and stereotypes are set and showcasing anything different from that will stir hatred. It’s considered bad because it gives women freedom and independence to make their choices which traditionally are looked down upon.

‘All men are trash’ is a phrase that has been blown out of proportion in the public’s view, what is the reason behind this, in your opinion?

Everyone thinks this but when a woman says it, then people have a problem. This is because of the diction; “All”. We can’t say some or 92.75% because it is hard to differentiate and if you are good then it’s not meant for you. They don’t get the point of the phase. 9/10 women you talk to have faced some kind of harassment but not even 1/10 men have faced such harassment from females or have been wrongly accused.

Look at this scenario: Will you trust your female families members or female friends or yourself (if you are a female) with an unknown man? The answer you will get is no. Why is that? Why is it that women feel safer with an unknown woman and men can trust their female families members or female friends with women but not a man? Why? – Well because we all think men are trash.

It is a very simple thing but people and again mostly men think it is about hating them. It is hating the large number of trash men who have done crimes. Women have shared several stories of harassment including being raped by their own fathers and brothers but their focus is on the “All men are trash” rather than our plight. A simple sentence hurts them more than what women go through every day. It speaks a lot about who you are as a person if that is the case.

Feminists support men also which they fail to see. Men can cry, men can wear pink, men have emotions, trans men periods issues to so many causes we have addressed and created awareness. There are pads now for transgender men because of us. These people who do the outrage for “All men are trash” phase never fight for men’s issues. In 93 % of rape cases against men, the predator was male. Men are trash to other men too.

“But women also rape” Yes, there are shit women out there too but very very less compared to male ones. So why anti-feminists against only 7% of the rapists? Clearly, they do not care about men!

As a citizen of India, and as a woman, do you feel safe in your country?

No. When I was 5 years old I used to go to Kindergarten in a bus in India. The bus conductor would touch me and I would go home red on my face and neck area. As a child I was not safe how would I be as a woman? That too in the national capital: New Delhi.

I lived in Kazakhstan for 8 years where I spent my entire childhood and then moved to Dubai and finished my higher education and now working. Every year in those years I went to India for holidays. I never went without my parents. Even if it was another family member I would not feel safe no matter how good they were. I still do not feel safe. I never will.

If you had the power to do something extremely good for women, what steps would you take in order to ensure the prevention of crimes against them?

Firstly, to implement compulsory school programs to educate boys from a young age to respect girls and women and treat them as equal. I know a lot of people will say teach self-defense to girls and this and that but why should we start with the victims and not the cause of the issue?

It starts at home. Equality. No gender roles, no superiority. Females should also know their rights. Right to education. Right to vote. Right to voice out. Right to work. Right to equal pay. So forth and so on.

Quality education is the only way to reach out to many boys and girls and educate from an early age to see each other as equal and know their fundamental human rights.

How annoying is it when you get any unsolicited pictures in your DM’s?

I have personally never experienced this and I am so thankful for that. But I know my friends who have and it is absolutely pathetic and disgusting. It is much more than annoying. The audacity these people have that they can do anything just because they are males. Who gave them the right to make someone so uncomfortable. There are young girls who receive this and she must be thinking why… what did I do? What is annoying is that it is always victim-blaming. Oh, you look hot in your DP that’s why you got this. Most girls have private accounts and why should that happen? Why do we have to live in such a closed secure manner? Why can’t we dress up the way we want and post whatever content we want on our accounts without getting such cheap DM’s.

And how annoying is it when you are walking in public and men start staring you in a creepy way? Do you get conscious when this happens and does that lower your confidence?

I am someone who doesn’t look at other people so I do not know who is looking and who is not but even if you are normally walking you see someone and they will stare at you like you are naked. Most of the time my mother notices it. Most girls and women then correct whatever they are wearing so that nothing is showing. You could be in a burkha and still be conscious of men around. It definitely lowers your confidence and you start questioning why you wore what you wore or why you are where you are. You just want to get out that situation as fast as you can because it is so uncomfortable no matter how confident you are in your daily life.

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